We are learning to write to describe a moment in time.
Once there was to dog’s at a private beach
as they bounced around in the water they found something hard
so they started digging because they thought it was a bone.
But it was just a stick so they just started jumping around again.
Then there owners called them so they came and their owners gave
them a giant bone each.
They finished their bones and started bouncing around in the water aegean.
finally they pulled it out.
was a ginormous safe made of stainless steel and the key was
in a waterproof bag. Their owners rushed over and opened it.
gave them a lifetime supply of bones and treats.
Once there was to dog’s at a private beach
as they bounced around in the water they found something hard
so they started digging because they thought it was a bone.
But it was just a stick so they just started jumping around again.
Then there owners called them so they came and their owners gave
them a giant bone each.
They finished their bones and started bouncing around in the water aegean.
finally they pulled it out.
was a ginormous safe made of stainless steel and the key was
in a waterproof bag. Their owners rushed over and opened it.
gave them a lifetime supply of bones and treats.
Harry I think your ending is humorous, imagine a lifetime supply of bones and treats. What more could we want. Catching your reader is the aim of writing - you have done well.
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